Because it’s the read-a-thon, and because I have a history of writing cheesy plagiarized songs, and because I’m going to spend a good part of today cheering for all of the readers out there, I just can’t let the day start without a song. This one was written specifically with today in mind.

I Need a New Book (to the tune of I Want a New Drug, by Huey Lewis and the News)

I need a new book
One that won’t make me yawn
One that’ll suck me in
And keep me from mowing the lawn

I need a new book
One that won’t make me over-think
One that won’t make my attention stray
Or drive me to drink

One that wont make me scared
When I’m alone
One that makes me feel like I feel when I read you
When I read you

I need a new book
One that won’t suck
One that won’t cost $50 bucks
Or make me upchuck

I need a new book
One that won’t make me cry
One that won’t make me sniffle
One that won’t make me dry my eyes

One that wont make me rant
At the author-dude
One that makes me feel like I feel when I read you
When I read you

I need a new book
One that says I’m the perfect book
One that won’t make me feel too bored
One that’s got a good hook

I need a new book
Maybe a graphic novel
One where the author doesn’t talk too much
Or one that’s filled with drivel

One that leaves me happy and
Wondering what to read next
One that makes me feel like I feel when I read you
When I read you